I guess this square is overdue. This is Stongheart the Paladin, from LJN’s first wave of Dungeons & Dragons toys in 1983. What a nerd.

Strongheart was one of only a couple D&D toys I had as a kid — I think I had the Titan as well. I almost immediately lost the sword — it got stuck out of reach under a radiator and peeling linoleum meant it couldn’t be dragged out. Anyway. The good guys are always going to lack the natural appeal of the villains, but I find Strongheart particularly doofy. The fact that he has underwear on over his armor is a good place to start. I also don’t like how muscle-y the armor is, or the way his feather looks more like his hair is smoldering. He’s just a hopeless dork. And why didn’t he come with a shield? The cape, I should note, is a replacement, made by the excellent Cape Master!